What made you stop being an addict?

There were times I was counting the days when I'm clean. But now I don't, because I got tired of counting and relapsing and starting all over again.

I started rubbing it and I liked how I was feeling so I kept on doing it faster and EUREKA, sperms came out of my dick.

No self esteem. No confidence. No ambition. Just dreams.

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I remember I once did it in my classroom at dawn. I did it in the hospital's washrooms. I did it in the lab where I work; both daytime and midnight.

Now I don't wait to be talked to before I respond. I talk when I think I'm supposed to.

Around age 9 I discovered pornography through my uncle, he had left the CD in the video player in the night after enjoying himself.

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And these were just the act and not the mental and social problems associated with addiction.

Is masturbation and p*rn bad?

So I'm still hanging on this lie.

Hello I am 17 year old boy and I am interested in transgender why?

Was quitting worth the effort? At least for my mental health, it's a billion times worth it.

This was February 2019.

I knew something had to be done about my wasting existence because if nothing changes, then nothing changes.

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I always wished they would sit inappropriately or the wind would blow up their dress so I can see things.

I remember sitting on the bed and smiling and that was when it hit me that I have successfully masturbated.

I saw every girl or woman as a sex object including kid girls. There was no way I would look at a woman and not think of f*cking her.

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Have I stopped seeing girls as sex objects? Not entirely, I still want to f*ck some of them.

So all I had to do was to find a way to trick my dirty brain to think that p*rn isn't nice.

All I knew was that, I couldn't masturbate without p*rn. I was first getting the urge to watch p*rn, while watching, I would now feel like masturbating.

Hello, I have a question about astral projection. I started to get interested in this a little while after my mum passed in april. I thought I may be able to see her and speak with her if I managed to achieve astral projection. Since this interest, every time i sleep on my back I go into sleep paralysis. However, I cant progress into astral projection because it is very scary for me as I feel like I'm suffocating when this happens. I panic and force myself to wake up. This only ever happened about once a year before this. It sometimes lasts a long time. This has happened about 3 times per week since my mum died, as mentioned on a previous post. I no longer try to go into it anymore(due to the suffocating feeling), but it still happens. I read that sleep paralysis is the pathway to astral projection. Why has this started to happen so frequently since simply taking an interest in it? Is this connected to the afterlife? I am concerned about it as I now cannot seem to stop this happening. Could it be my mum trying to communicate? Im asking due to more knowledge around this in this group.

And I can also talk to them now.

But how was I going to do it when everything I knew wasn't working? I didn't know

I got tired of always breaking the promises I made to myself.

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RUN 🏃‍♂️ for your dear life

I secretly kept on watching and watching until I got 19. At this time, I had started feeling the urge to ejaculate as I was watching the pornography.

I so badly wanted to f*uk a girl, yet I was so shy of girls. I never wanted to meet anyone. I always wanted to hide behind the phone and text.

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I did it in my room. I did it in my washroom. I did it in school in the washrooms.

A couple of months later I started hating it and regretting after every session. Yet, I couldn't stop.

Now how do you quit your addiction?

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I did it in my administrator's office.

I know some people masturbate and they don't have the problems I went through.

Am I totally free? I don't know 😕

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I knew about masturbation but I didn't actually think of doing it but one day, on my bed when I was preparing to go to school I was watching pornography and something just came in mind; why don't you rob your dick with your hand?

I went on my favourite site and started scrolling through my favourite categories; petite girls, sleeping girls, Japanese girls, Japanese mom, Japanese wife, massage, forced, in the bus, gangb*ng, Muslim girls, ebony, student and teacher, in the classroom, curvy, African, etc

But for me, I would say RUN away from it

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Do I wake up everyday with lots of energy? No but that's because I have a health problem, which is a story for another day.

I just finished watching the best of the best p*rn videos on the planet. Now there's nothing else to look for on p*rn sites again.

Just keep trying

Do you have any fantasies you are ashamed of?

I made sure I downloaded every video that was nice for me. This took almost the whole day.

The harder I tried, the worse it became. I could get angry with myself and go about 3 days without it but when I relapse, I can do 3 in a day. And the subsequent days; it's just me getting drowned in the rabbit hole.

I didn't even start counting the days because I didn't really believe I would get this far.

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It didn't feel great after ejaculating but hey, who cares about feelings?

I did it while watching my sister. I did it while touching my sister 😭 I did it while watching my landlord's daughter.

Remember, if nothing changes, nothing changes.

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I went there early in the morning trying to watch a movie and I found the CD inside the video player so I decided to watch what was on it and that was the beginning of the life I never wanted.

Read that again ☝️

It took me days to finish watching them. Finally I decided to go to the washroom to do The Last Fap.

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Now I know I have all the nice videos on my phone, the rest I don't have, are not nice. So I had to start watching them one after the other. Some of them were even 2 hours long but I made sure I watched every little bit of it.

Oh, and everyday I woke up tired 😫 I never slept early too. My mental health was nothing to write home about.

And I DID IT EVERYDAY

Now I have the mental fortitude to face life's every day battles.

So I thought had unlocked a new potential in life. I was doing it even if I don't feel the urge. I forced the urge to come by watching pornography.

There were times I could go 3 months without watching p*rn or masturbating but somehow I always came back to it.

I don't know if all addictions are like this 🤔